Sunday 27 May 2012

Eurovision: Backstage Babble

Following Sweden’s victory in the 26 country strong Eurovision competition last night, rumours have emerged that there was more backstage drama than initially perceived to those viewing in countries around the globe.

The Russian grannies’ number set a fine example of what could potentially happen if medication were to be neglected at their age, and despite placing a sweet second the sextuplet decided to protest against the victorious ‘Euphoria’ track performed by Loreen by demonstration of chaining their mobility scooters to the stage, obviously influenced by steps seen by anti-cut protesters outside the UK’s deputy prime minister, Nick Clegg’s home.

Rumours have already circulated about identical Irish duo, Jedward and UK participant, Englebert Humperdinck joining forces and amalgamating their acts to produce ‘Jengleward’ during the semi-finals as Englebert’s penultimate scathing defeat has forced him to reconsider his career options and insiders would suggest that he’s already purchased his Wizard of Oz style Tin Man-esque catsuit, complete with shoulder pads and a synthetic blonde quiff due to significant aged hair fragility.

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